Golnoosh Nour is a poet, prose writer, and lecturer. She’s the author of The Ministry of Guidance and other stories – shortlisted for the Polari Prize 2021. Her work has also appeared in Granta, Spontaneous Poetics, and Columbia Journal amongst others. She has co-edited Magma 80 and an anthology of contemporary queer writing forthcoming from Muswell Press.
waiting for my girlfriend to come to me waiting for my girlfriend to come for me waiting for my girlfriend to laugh at me – so I can weep waiting for my test results to rescue me waiting for my boyfriend to put on his lipstick and suck me waiting for my boyfriend to don his dress and leave waiting for my country to let me exist waiting for any country to let me exist waiting for my employers to pay me waiting for socialism to breathe waiting for my wounds to heal waiting for my relatives to ignore me waiting for my parents to spoil me waiting for my siblings to admit waiting for my friends to vanish – so I can write an award-winning elegy waiting for my lovers to tell me I’m their one and only as I leave waiting for my favourite writers to read me waiting for my favourite writers to ravish me waiting for my publishers to prioritise me waiting for my critics to patronise me waiting for my words to transcend mediocrity
for the rain to drown me for the storm to assault me for spring to come clean for the moon to bleed for the autumn to revive me for the trees to fall on me waiting for myself to reach me.